Becoming a family-friendly restaurant: what parents really look for

A family going out to eat rarely chooses based on the menu. It chooses based on one question: can we sit here for two hours without it turning into a battle. Whoever answers that question with yes gets the table.

That's good news, because the answer depends only slightly on your kitchen.

What parents really judge

• Is there something to do while waiting, and does it still work after ten minutes?
• Can the children's food arrive before the parents' food?
• Is there room for a pram without half the venue having to shift aside?
• Is there a relaxed reaction if something gets knocked over?
• Are there other families, or are you the only one among couples clearly looking for peace and quiet?

The most important question a parent asks isn't 'is it tasty' but 'will this be relaxed or not'.

The kids' menu is the least important part

Almost every venue has one, and it's virtually the same everywhere. So it doesn't set you apart. What does stand out: a smaller portion of something from the regular menu, or the option to share. Parents appreciate it when their child doesn't automatically end up with the frikandel.

Entertainment that keeps working

Colouring pages keep a child occupied for five to ten minutes. After that, they start again, or get bored. What works longer is something with variety built in.

Games on the table via a QR code have two advantages here. There's nothing to lose or tidy up, and a child can play several rounds in a row without it staying the same. Games like memory, spot the difference and puzzles are short enough for the waiting time. See the overview.

What's needed at each age

Family-friendly isn't a single category but a range. What works for a three-year-old bores a nine-year-old within a minute.

• Up to about four: a parent's attention is the only thing that really works. What you can offer is a sturdy high chair and food that arrives quickly.
• Four to seven: colouring, sticking, and short games that don't involve reading. Memory and spot-the-difference fall into this category.
• Seven to eleven: this is the age at which a child can start entertaining themselves independently. Puzzles, quizzes and games against a brother or sister hold their attention longest.
• Eleven and older: they want to be treated like the rest of the table. A game the whole family joins in with works better than something specifically for children.

The age most venues aim for is four to seven, while it's actually the group above that stays seated longest and stands out most when things go wrong.

Timing in the kitchen

This is the adjustment that makes the most difference and costs nothing. Let the children's food go out ten minutes before the parents'. Children eat faster and finish sooner; if everyone starts at the same time, the children are finished while the parents are halfway through, and that's when the restlessness begins.

What you don't need to do

A play corner is the solution people think of most often and that pays off least often. It takes up space you need on a busy evening, it needs keeping clean, and it draws children away from the table right when the food arrives. Only do it if you genuinely have the space to spare.

What your staff need to know

This is the part that gets skipped most often, and it matters more than the layout. Three things that make the difference between a relaxed family table and a tense one:

• Address the child, not only the parent. A child who's allowed to order themselves sits differently at the table than a child being talked about.
• React to spilled food before the parent apologises. Whoever turns up with a cloth themselves removes the awkwardness. Whoever waits to be asked confirms it.
• Don't ask if everything's to their liking the moment a child is crying. Come back two minutes later.

None of these three cost money or time. They only cost someone having said it once.

The moments where it goes wrong

When a family visit goes wrong, it almost always happens at one of these three points:

1. On arrival, when it turns out there's no high chair or the table is too cramped. That immediately sets the tone.
2. Twenty minutes after ordering, when the food still hasn't arrived and the children have nothing to do. This is the longest and heaviest moment.
3. After the main course, when the parents want coffee and the children are finished. This is where a venue loses the extra order that would otherwise have happened.

Points two and three are both waiting time, and both can be solved with something a child can do independently.

Show it before they're inside

Parents check your Google profile before booking. Make sure there's a photo showing a family at the table, and state literally in the description that children are welcome and what's on offer for them. That brings in more bookings than any change to the venue itself.

More on how this plays out for a restaurant is on the restaurant page; what it costs is on the pricing page.